Flippant quip that got me exiled from FaceBook

“When I was 7 years old I was molested by Woody Allen. I was just innocuously practicing my tennis swing when Uncle Woody handed me a vial of his antidepressants and a copy of Crime and Punishment and then went at it. It really sucks because I was hoping to get sexually molested by the Diane Keaton of Annie Hall, the ingénue-eyed Mariel Hemingway of Manhattan or that hot chick from Match Point (the classy British chick. Phuck Scarlet Johannson). He bribed me with Knicks tickets and then took me to see Miss Saigon, lulling me to sleep with the dulcet octaves of his clarinet before instituting the molestation all over again. Lucky, I was able to go over to my good friend Philip Seymour Hoffman’s house and watch Trainspotting for solace… “

 When you are a writer you write about everything. You constantly push the sociological barometer in an endeavor to chauffer your readers into viewing the periphery of this planet from a different plateau. A different cosmological tumbling parallax.  A poetic purlieu. If yer a writer your only job is to take someone you have never met somewhere they I have never been before, or never travelled gladly and beyond....

 

to read my elbow rant in its wayward entirety click here...http://vegantilvalentiensday.blogspot.com/2014/02/day-21-superbowl-souffle-freedom-of.html